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Thread: Winners For Jack Riepe's MOA Column: Choosing The Best Riding Partner...

  1. #16
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    "I tried to smoke a pig's head once." Ah. I see the problem here. Two things my mama taught all her chitlins: 1) Never smoke a pigs head or rump. As you say, they do not draw well, and; 2) Never try to teach a pig to sing. It is a waste of your time, and is annoying to the pig.
    I believe item 2 may have value in this situation as a parable, where 'K bike rider' and "Rider's of the blessed Immohotep's gift to mankind" can be substituted in the lesson plan.
    And BTW, each month, along with the arrival of the ON (and its insidious K-propaganda written by that urban terrorist, cigar smoker, and 007-wanna-be), I get the grumbly down in my tumbly that urges me to find a K bike to go along with the other infernal combustion devices contained within my garage. But three things always seem to calm the urge: there really isn't any room for a 'new' bike that will probably need some form of tender fondling; I haven't got enough time to fix the two Bocthers already in there, and; SWMBO has already threatened my nether regions with the pruning shears with regard to another vehicle. [Actually, the threat isn't real, because she already has possession of those bits (she carries them around in her purse, in case I ever need them again).]

  2. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by 36654 View Post
    The other two candidates had the chances as a snowman at the Bloomsburg Rally.
    Technically speaking, that is still a chance.

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by jstrube View Post
    The only man who wouldn't like your column probably drinks cosmos & hasn't had the company of a hot wife or 2 like some of us...
    It's funny that you mention this. A guy showed up at the door here yesterday with a cosmo in one hand and his other arm wrapped around a woman who bore a disapproving look on her face.

    "Yes?" I asked.

    "I'd like to discuss the shortcomings of your column," he replied.

    There was a bright yellow "Honda Hobbit" parked at the curb.

    Sincerely,
    Riepe

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by 36654 View Post
    The K-bike, with its integral crotch warmer, was designed by Bubbahotep, a Pharaoh accustomed to more southern climates. Thankfully, the King (the one from Memphis) and Jack Kennedy (in disguise) saved us from that unholy tyrant, as documented in the classic Bruce Campbell movie from 2002
    BMW "K" bikes are designed to run warm as their riders are invariably "cool." There s a reason why "K" comes before "R" in the alphabet. It is the natural order of things. (Hey, I don't make the rules. I just acknowledge the inevitable.)

    Riepe

  5. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockbottom View Post
    I keep checking the flea market every day for the pig's head.
    Sir:

    One of my former mother-in-laws has it. She is in the Witness Protection Program and wears it when she goes into town.

    Riepe

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPRiepe View Post
    Sir:

    One of my former mother-in-laws has it. She is in the Witness Protection Program and wears it when she goes into town.

    Riepe
    But how is that considered a disguise?

  7. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by ClassicVW View Post
    But how is that considered a disguise?
    So you know her?

    Riepe

  8. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPRiepe View Post
    BMW "K" bikes are designed to run warm as their riders are invariably "cool." There s a reason why "K" comes before "R" in the alphabet. It is the natural order of things. (Hey, I don't make the rules. I just acknowledge the inevitable.)

    Riepe
    So, you pick a rider with an "F" bike to continue your regression (by association) along the alphabet?
    Cave contents: 99 R11RS, 2013 Toyota Tacoma, 03 Simplicity Legacy, 97 Stihl FS75, Dewalt DW625 & DW744

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPRiepe View Post
    So you know her?

    Riepe
    No, just a lucky guess...

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