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Thread: Rules of Motorcycling

  1. #1
    Caribbean Druid
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    Rules of Motorcycling

    Since we have Rules of the Road, how about my Rules of Motorcycling?:

    DougÔÇÖs Rules of Motorcycling
    1. The chance of collecting a nail in a tire is inversely proportional to the tireÔÇÖs mileage.
    2. The only dead animal carcass for 100 miles will be directly in your bikeÔÇÖs path of travel, around a blind curve.
    3. Your motorcycleÔÇÖs seat will be comfortable for the first 400 miles and hell after that. You will discover this on the first 700 mile day of your 5000 mile trip.
    4. Batteries and chains fail without warning, usually on the same 5000 mile trip.
    5. Pre-running guarantees that something on the route will change after the pre-run and before the group ride.
    6. The first bug splat of the day on your face shield will be directly in your line of sight.
    a. Corollary 1: It will be the biggest bug splat of the day.
    b. Corollary 2: It will happen just before you roll into your favorite set of twisties.
    7. (Speaking of twisties) Just after you round the first corner, you will find a slow moving pack of Harleys in front of you.
    8. As a group leader, at least one motorcycle in your group will be running on bald tires. When you point that out, the rider will insist he still gets good traction, even though the cord is showing on the tire.
    9. Remember: The weatherman is only right 50% of the time.
    10. Communications fail just as you need them. (This is an old military adageapplies here as well!)

  2. #2
    2011 R1200RT ka5ysy's Avatar
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    Given a weather forecast of 20% chance of rain, your intended path of travel will contain 100% of the 20%, and always where there is no possibility of a safe pull-out.

    Record rainfall will always occur when you forgot your rain gear.

    "Waterproof" rain gear is not. It also makes a nice portable sauna.

    "Breathable" rain gear usually means you stay dryer in the rain without the gear on.

    Any new tire has a 95% probability of finding the only nail or screw on the roadway in your neighborhood.

    OEM "Comfort seats" are not.

    The CO2 cartridges in a tire repair kit contain precisely 20% of the gas volume necessary to re-inflate a flat tire.

    A Warranty will expire 1 week before you have a major mechanical failure.

    Murphy hates motorcycles.
    Doug, 2011 R1200RT Polar Metallic
    MSF #127350 NAUI #36288

  3. #3
    Registered User donbmw's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=dwestly;854184]Since we have Rules of the Road, how about my Rules of Motorcycling?:

    DougÔÇÖs Rules of Motorcycling

    3. Your motorcycleÔÇÖs seat will be comfortable for the first 400 miles and hell after that. You will discover this on the first 700 mile day of your 5000 mile trip.

    I agree with this execpt this is the way for me.

    The first 100 to 200 miles and the last 100 to 200 miles is the seat is uncomfortable and the last is the worst cause you getting close to home. Everything between you forget about since this is the only way you are going to get where you going or back home.

    Don
    1975 R90/6, 1980 and 1982 R65, !959 TR3A Triumph Car

  4. #4
    Registered User lkchris's Avatar
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    The seat will get more comfortable on the 2nd or 3rd day of the trip.
    Kent Christensen
    21482
    '12 R1200RT, '02 R1100S, '84 R80G/S

  5. #5
    Caribbean Druid
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    The seat doesn't get more comfortable...the butt just goes numb by then LOL.

  6. #6
    Registered User WalterK75's Avatar
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    When you finally reach that twisty road where you can really lean into the curves there will be a car or truck ahead of you driving at exactly the speed limit.
    Walter

    All government, of course, is against liberty.
    H. L. Mencken

  7. #7
    OldBMWMaster JDOCKERY132445's Avatar
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    On the Parkway

    Anytime you have a problem on the Blue Ridge Parkway, a good-looking woman will stop to help you; and she will have beer.
    Jerry Dockery
    309 N. 3rd. Ave.
    Kure Beach, NC 28449
    1996 R1100RT main bike & 1985 K100RS...too fast to believe.

  8. #8
    K'nothead
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    #1 Rule of Motorcycling...

    It's been 40 years since I actively taught motorcycling, but I remember we had a "top 10" rules of motorcycling back then. Actually, there were several variations on the list(s), but the common number 1 in all of them was:

    "A motorcycle's natural position is lying on it's side."

    This rule obviously has a number of corollaries (i.e. think ATGATT), but with the exception of hacks & trikes (not really motorcycles), the fundamental truth of the statement is as valid today as it ever was.

    Just my $.02...

    JP

  9. #9
    Out There Somewhere bmwrider88's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jopars View Post
    It's been 40 years since I actively taught motorcycling, but I remember we had a "top 10" rules of motorcycling back then. Actually, there were several variations on the list(s), but the common number 1 in all of them was:

    "A motorcycle's natural position is lying on it's side."
    ....the fundamental truth of the statement is as valid today as it ever was.

    Just my $.02...

    JP
    Gravity- not just a good idea, it's THE LAW.

    Triple the "slow moving pack of Harleys in front of you" rule for south central PA.
    Be The Change You Want To See In The World

  10. #10
    Rally Rat
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    Quote Originally Posted by bmwrider88 View Post
    Gravity- not just a good idea, it's THE LAW.

    Triple the "slow moving pack of Harleys in front of you" rule for south central PA.
    Down shift, twist wrist, upshift...... no more pack ahead of you!

  11. #11
    AirHeader13
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    Ha!

    Quote Originally Posted by john1691 View Post
    Down shift, twist wrist, upshift...... no more pack ahead of you!
    Ha! If I rode a 1200 I would think it was that easy too!

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