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Thread: What if your SO doesn't share your passion?

  1. #1
    sMiling Voni's Avatar
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    What if your SO doesn't share your passion?

    Another thread got me thinking about how lucky I am to have my mechanic, Paul, who shares my passion for motorcycling. I'm wondering, how do you cope when the one you enjoy sharing life with doesn't see motorcycling as as compelling as you do. . . .

    Voni
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  2. #2
    DWWILSON
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    Antidote to spouse who doesn't: FF sMiles

    In the thirty five years my wife and I have been married, she's only been on the back of the bike once ("....and that's @#&%!! plenty!"). She also once 'test rode' a Honda 75cc I bought for our 10 yr old daughter for Christmas. That ended badly when she panicked coming up our steep driveway with the throttle wide open (is there any other way on that bike?) and crashed into the garage door.

    However, she's been amazingly understanding of my addiction (nee, passion). In '02 she blessed (well maybe sanctioned is more like it) an epoch riding/camping trip to Alaska with my then 12 yr old daughter as a pillion. She flew to Juno, Wassila (nope, couldn't see Sarah from the porch of our B&B) and flew home to CO from Anchorage. More recently we've mototoured NZ, Italy, Canadian Maritimes, and most of the Southwest US, each time using FF miles where I ride, she flies/drives and meets me. Not for everyone, but it's worked well for us for a pretty good stretch now.

  3. #3
    RK Ryder
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    Years ago we did ride on two small bikes in Europe for three months, but that was about 40 years ago. She's been on my two bike twice. She has no interest in riding, but she is the one who told me to pick up the first one, and after a few years when the first died at the beginning of the summer, I was told to pickup a spare. I take many extended holidays on the bikes and keep in touch by phone. Not a problem for either of us.
    Paul
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    Rpbump USN RET CPO Rpbump's Avatar
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    Smile

    My wife of 44 years does not like riding pillion on a motorcycle. She took driving lessons for automobiles years ago but decided that driving was not for her. However my passion for riding has her blessing even though she worries. Like Paul said in a previous post we keep in touch via phone when I travel. Med-Jet insurance will be supplemented with a "SPOT" device this year giving both of us some peace of mind. I like to tent camp and Gypsy thinks of camping as staying at the Holiday Inn. We both like to cruise on ships and enjoy going to Las Vegas. A recent purchase of an R100RT with a Ural side car might get her to ride locally. "I HOPE" If she does like the hack I will probably trade/sell my 3 bikes for a well equiped hack so we can enjoy traveling together.
    Ride safe

  5. #5
    Registered User motorcycletripper's Avatar
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    I'm the wifey of a very gifted rider... you know the type that's been riding since the age of 2 or so.... luckily I share his absolute passion for motorcycles and he encourages and pushes me to test the limits often! If I was riding solo all the time I think I'd have a slower learning curve... but a less expensive and painful one... if you know what I mean... In any case, I'll ride with or without him! Its important to follow your own dreams even if they don't agree 100% with you significant other.
    Looks like I might be doing a corner to corner cross country to Philadelphia this year, if he sticks to his guns and wuses out!
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  6. #6
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    In my case it is short day trips only with my wife. She enjoys being a passenger but has no desire to take any extended trips on two or four wheels.

    Roy
    Roy G.
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  7. #7
    Registered User tourunigo's Avatar
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    ..... I couldn't get to the end of our driveway without Mary jumping on We've talked to lots of guys especially who have a sad note in their voice when they talk about their SOs not wanting to ride with them. Sharing is such a wonderful part of the experience. I am fortunate (just look at those two nut bars in our blog sig below!). - Bob
    Last edited by tourunigo; 01-05-2011 at 04:53 PM. Reason: sentence repair
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  8. #8
    Survivor akbeemer's Avatar
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    So what about women who ride and have a husband that does not share their passion? I know of one woman that is a LD rider and takes extended multi-country trips without her husband of many years. I know of no husband that rides pillion with his wife on a regular basis, but I'm guessing they out there,
    Kevin Huddy
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  9. #9
    Motorcycle Muffin
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    Quote Originally Posted by AKBeemer View Post
    So what about women who ride and have a husband that does not share their passion? I know of one woman that is a LD rider and takes extended multi-country trips without her husband of many years. I know of no husband that rides pillion with his wife on a regular basis, but I'm guessing they out there,
    I was married to a guy who didn't share my passion for riding. He'd commute to work en moto, sure, but could NOT understand why I'd slog out of bed at 6am on a Sunday morning to go for a ride to nowhere.

    Key word there, I guess, is "was."

    Now I still ride alone quite a lot, but the ends of my rides are much cheerier.
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  10. #10
    Registered User RINTY's Avatar
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    ...how do you cope...Voni
    There's really no coping for me, as I prefer to ride solo, or with my brother and a couple of friends.

    The coping is for my wife, who worries quite a bit about me having an accident while I'm away.

    Otherwise, we have a number of common interests, and spend lots of time together; we've been married for 36 years.
    Last edited by rinty; 01-06-2011 at 02:40 PM.
    Rinty

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  11. #11
    Registered User bluegrasspicker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Voni View Post
    Another thread got me thinking about how lucky I am to have my mechanic, Paul, who shares my passion for motorcycling. I'm wondering, how do you cope when the one you enjoy sharing life with doesn't see motorcycling as as compelling as you do. . . .

    Voni
    Works both ways !


  12. #12
    Merlin III
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    When you get to a certain age

    you don't have to do everything together. My wife doesn't care for MCs very much and would just as soon stay home with the grandkids and that is fine. We do plenty of things together, but MCing will never be one of them.

  13. #13
    Registered User tourunigo's Avatar
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    ..... of course, as we all know, life is about choices. This fella in Cuba has an interesting take on it..... (it was in our newspaper this morning.... how timely) - Bob

    Last edited by tourunigo; 01-08-2011 at 12:23 AM.
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  14. #14
    It is what it is. Bud's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BluegrassPicker View Post
    Works both ways !

    O heck ya I wanna fly!
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  15. #15
    Registered User soph9's Avatar
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    I think it would hard if my partner did not share my passion. We ride a lot together and my passion/addiction is even worse than hers. With that being said...we have issues at times with my addiction at times consuming my brain power to be present when I am off the bike.

    So, even when you have a partner who LOVES riding there still can be the need to cope and compromise the needs vs. wants. I will get in the cage and drive with her even though I figure we can always ride the bike to anywhere, anytime.

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