On the subject of "Speeding Tickets"

[BMWRich58]

Subject: Cops Do have a sense of humor

Who says cops don't have a sense of humor? The following were taken off of actual police car videos around the country..


"Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

"Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

"Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun."

"So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

"Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh ... did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

"Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

"Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop."

"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

"In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

"Just how big were those two beers?"

"No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have a quotas but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

"I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

"You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."

[BMWRich58]

I do know from EXPERIENCE that trying to "get out of a ticket in Yellowstone Park" (65mph in a 45) can get you a quick reservation in the Crobar Hotel !!!

Especially when you try to explain to the "TWO Smokies" (officers), that in Chicago where I'm from, "here's how we handle things".......!!!.......

.....I think that when I brought up the subject of $$$$,that's when the whole situation went south .... do ya think..?????

[YB in IN]

Originally posted by BMWRich58
I do know from EXPERIENCE that trying to "get out of a ticket in Yellowstone Park" (65mph in a 45) can get you a quick reservation in the Crobar Hotel !!!

Especially when you try to explain to the "TWO Smokies" (officers), that in Chicago where I'm from, "here's how we handle things".......!!!.......

.....I think that when I brought up the subject of $$$$,that's when the whole situation went south .... do ya think..?????

That perhaps may have not been the best course of action. ;)